The Illuminated Mother

 

Sexuality & Intimacy Coaching

  • Are you a mom who since having kids has felt a loss of self? 

  • Do you look at your kids and family and are filled up with gratitude but still feel like something is missing?

  • Do you not recognize yourself anymore because the things that used to bring you joy and a sense of self are gone? 

  • Is it hard to consider yourself a sexual being since becoming a mom and you have no idea where to even start finding that side of yourself again? 

  • Does sex feel like a chore and one more thing on your to-do list?

  • Do you want to increase your sexual desire but have no idea what even turns you on these days?

  • Do you feel like a stranger in your own body?

Pregnancy and birth are often the first time in a woman’s life that her body is not her own.  A history of sexual trauma, physical trauma or chronic pain are reasons that a woman may already be in a state of physical disconnection prior to being pregnant.  Many women intentionally or unintentionally disconnect from their pelvis after birth, especially when any form of birth trauma (physical or psychological/emotional) was experienced but even if the birth itself was reported as positive.   

The result is mothers who are disconnected from their physical bodies below the belt.  Mothers who have forgotten how to connect to their own pleasure or even the desire to feel pleasure again.  The result is mothers who no longer associate themselves with being a sexual being; someone who wants sexual pleasure and views this pleasure as a part of their OWN physical, mental and emotional wellness. 

I have guided hundreds of women back into their bodies and sex lives after having a baby.  This has involved both physical healing from my physical therapy skills but also involved coaching on how to start reconnecting with their own bodies and their partners for the purpose of intimacy and sexual pleasure.  I am passionate about helping mothers reclaim their sexuality to whatever capacity they desire.  

Within the clinical constraints of my physical therapy practice, I am not able to provide the full expansiveness of support to clients.  The offering of Illuminated Mother Coaching allows clients to work with me beyond the physical therapy scope of practice or completely without the physical therapy component, to dive deeper into the goals of reclaiming oneself as a sexual being AND a mother.  

They can both co-exist and I’m excited and honored to support you as you turn back on your pilot light and live your life as an Illuminated Mother.

WHY become an illuminated mother?

  • Because your body is your own.
  • Because your body wants you to reconnect with her, in fact, she is just waiting for it.
  • Because you are innately a sexual being.
  • Because pleasure is a birthright.
  • Because becoming a mother does not mean you have to lose a part of yourself.
  • Because sexual pleasure is a part of your health and wellness.
  • Because life is better when your sexuality pilot light is on.
  • Because you will lower your stress and be able to self soothe easier.

Connecting to one’s own sexuality connects us to ourselves, our bodies, and our senses.  Connecting to our sexuality can lower the stress of motherhood, gives us permission to experience pleasure, and gives us the foundation to connect to others both in sexual and non-sexual ways.

“Every time a woman has sex simply because it feels good it is revolutionary, she is revolutionary, she is pushing back against society’s insistence that she exists simply for men’s pleasure or for reproduction. A woman who prioritizes her sexual needs is scary because a woman who prioritizes her sexual needs prioritizes herself. That is a woman demanding that she be treated as an equal.  That is a woman who insists you make room for her at the table of power and that is the most terrifying of all because we can’t make room for her without some of us giving up the extra space we hold.”

-Sofia Jawed-Wessel  

TEDxTalk “Women’s Sexual Pleasure: What are we so afraid of?”

How is coaching different from other modalities such as therapy?

Therapy tends to work on discovering how we got to where we are and who we are.  Coaching starts where you are and uses different forms of coaching to support you towards your goals of where you want to go. 

What do you want your life to look like and let’s work on the journey together towards those goals.  We will look into your past when needed to explain where you are but the main focus is forwards. 

I am a SomaticaⓇ trained Sex & Intimacy coach and use modalities learned in my training combined with my own methods to hold sacred safe space for you to explore and discover.  There is no protocol or pre-defined goals.  

Each coaching journey looks different to each individual because what lights us up and makes us feel illuminated is different.  I celebrate and encourage all of it.  You truly cannot shock me and I am about as non-judgemental as they come.  

Coaching is much more interactive than therapy.  I am not just a passive ear to listen.  I will hold space for you, guide you, coach you, mirror back to you, suggest things and support you each time we meet.  Coaching in itself is an intimate experience and intimate relationship because it requires both of us to show up with vulnerability.  

My practice is not couples coaching because my focus is to support mothers as individuals to find and nurture their own illumination.  We do not operate in a bubble so relationships are absolutely a part of coaching but I am only working with you as my client.  When you find your light, your turn on, your voice and your empowerment, you will radiate this work out into your relationships with your partner(s), future partner(s), friends and kids. 

My coaching is sex positive, gender and sexual orientation inclusive, relationship structure inclusive of monogamy, ethical non-monogamy and polyamorous.